The Moneyist: ‘This will be an expensive trip’: I’ve been invited to a destination wedding in New Orleans. I live in L.A. Is it tacky to ask the bride if I can bring a plus-one?

We don’t have many mutual friends anymore, and those we do have are married, so I won’t be able to share a hotel room with anyone. This will be an expensive trip for me with airfare, hotels, taxis, etc. 

As a social worker for my 9-5 job and a babysitter on evenings and weekends, I do have to think about money. Not to mention, I have been to New Orleans several times, and I’d rather spend my money on my destination of choice.

The average cost of attending a destination wedding is $2,700, according to a recent survey by the travel company Priceline, which also said that 79% of couples are planning one in the next 12 months. Frankly, I don’t buy that. I don’t see nearly eight in 10 people getting on a plane, and asking their guests to get on a plane to go to their wedding. Of course, a destination wedding could technically mean a hotel on a lake 60 miles away. The Knot says an estimated 20% of couples have destination weddings. In 2022, we must also take into account the risk of COVID-19.

So how many people RSVP “yes” to long-distance nuptials? Anywhere from between 60% to 75%, according to some estimates, while others put the percentage of guests who say they’ll attend at less than 50%. Couples know that some relatives won’t be able or willing to travel; having a destination wedding allows the bride and groom to invite Plan B guests knowing that their seats will be filled by Plan A guests. Personally, the reception would probably be a hell of a lot more fun if Great Aunt Ida was burning up the dance floor after too many G&Ts.

A plus-one for single friends is good etiquette. There will be cake. There will be dancing. There will be vows. There will be sunshine. There will be cancellations.

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