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The Moneyist: My aunt left me her home after I took care of her for 12 years. Her brother, my uncle, won’t speak to me. I offered to give him the house. What more can I do?

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Dear Quentin,

About 12 years ago, I started taking care of my maternal aunt and her husband. They had no kids. They live 30 minutes from me. I took care of their tax returns. I am an engineer, and not a CPA, but I have been doing tax returns for my family and relatives for years (for free, of course).   

While reviewing the returns, I found my aunt had been filing fraudulent tax returns through another firm (without her knowledge). I fixed some older ones and started doing the returns correctly. She trusted me to assist her. I just did it without asking or expecting any kind of compensation.   

In 2015, my aunt and her husband said they would gift her house to me. This house was already free and clear. Her brother, my uncle, assisted her with the initial down payment when she purchased the home back in 1990. She did not wish to pay for a living trust.

“‘In 2015, my aunt and her husband said they would gift her house to me. This house was already free and clear. Her brother, my uncle, assisted her with the initial down payment.’”

By 2017/2018, my aunt’s and her husband’s health had been declining (Parkinson’s disease). My wife and I promised to assist them with living expenses, doctor’s appointments, care facilities, nursing care, hospital visits, etc. We did all that as promised. 

In 2019, her husband passed away. From that point on, we paid for live-in care for my aunt. I finally asked my eldest sister to live with her. I compensated my sister in caring for her. Within one year, my aunt passed away.    

We cleaned up the house, remodeled it, pulled money out (70% loan-to-value ratio) and finally rented it. We actually gave out shares of the cash-out to my siblings (all of them had assisted me one way or another in her care).  

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